Posted by Karen Brody in I had a client consultation a few days ago by someone referred to me. He told me he’d be “interviewing” several prospects.
As I listened to him talk about the issues with his girlfriend – one of those being that she isn’t grateful for all of the opportunities his income provides – I could hear many openings for healing.
He turned that “captain of industry” energy on me ultimately, and asked, “So what makes you qualified to be my counselor?”
Men tend to jump toward challenges like this, where women tend to retreat. It’s like trying to get nectar from a tree by hitting it with a bulldozer.
This is a classic example of a man using a dominant style of relating to engage a woman. He applied force instead of gentleness, and what that did is force me to retreat and withdraw my heart. You can’t pound the loving essence of out someone.
The point here is don’t challenge a woman like you challenge your men friends, if you want to connect with her and elicit her loving. Instead cherish and encourage, and gentle her to open her heart to you. This will always produce the sweetest nectar.
Karen Brody, copyright 2009. All rights reserved. For reprint permission, contact the author.
